All I Want for Christmas is U... (Remy's Holiday Ode to a Sound Monetary Policy)

The value of Remy's soon-tob-be Christmas classic can only be determined after adjusting for inflation.

Approx. 2:30

Written and performed by Remy. Edited and animated by Meredith Bragg.

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LYRICS:

I don't want no eggnog, lactose ain't for me
I don't need new pants. Then again...TBD...
Don't want any gifts this Christmas it's true
all I want for Christmas is...

I don't want a Surface tablet, that one's pretty clear
I don't want that new book by Martin Bashir
There's only one this I want, yes it's true
all I want for Christmas is U.....

...nilateral printing of billions of dollars
a month to be stopped cuz it's causing my dollar to
rampantly inflate, I tell you it's killing us
all of this open-ended fiscal stimulus
Risk underpricing and rampant inflation
resulting in capital misallocation
all I want this holiday season
is an end to quantitative easing

Now Santa I know you get this a lot
those children's letters concernedly fraught
But I'll tell you what I want and save you some pains
I'll take the candy--you can keep the Keynes

Presents under the tree, the Fed starting to taper
Because only one of them should be covered in short-term paper
Don't want nothing else for Christmas it's true
all I want for Christmas is U....

...uniformity in the mandate of the Fed
or reform the whole thing or start over instead
because I ain't a pro but I really don't think that
it's "Buy CDO's with some dough from an Inkjet"
The year home run records were obliterated
that was the last time we saw Bonds so inflated
all I want this holiday season
all I want this holiday season
all I want this holiday season
is an end to quantitative easing.